drained.

this morning was an emotional morning at church. we talked about katrina, and about how we can help. it's horrible to feel as if you can't help. especially if what you really want to do is to go... feed the hungry. take diapers to the babies. help the children find a way to go to school. care for the sick. ha. care for the sick. i'm not yet properly trained to do any such thing. in fact, i pity the sick man who must rely on me to make decisions regarding his health. so for now, i'll stay the course set out before me. so one day i may care for the sick.

tonight, karma and his wife, and another friend of ours went to see the constant gardener. the footage of hundreds of africans standing in line waiting to take a medication that would poison them; a little girl running across the desert alone after her village was raided; big name pharmaceutical companies out to make a buck and willing to silence anyone who dares stand in their way. the entire scenario would be stomach-wrenching enough were it entirely fabricated. but my true concern is that things of this nature go on.

the mantra of every budding medical student - "i just want to help people." the goal in your medical school interview is to come up with a clever way to say it. my day has been absolutely smothered in people. people who need help. and i don't know how.