r.e.s.p.e.c.t.

i really admire people who are able to walk into a public bathroom stall that has not been flushed by it's prior, eh... "occupant" and flush it for them. it completely disgusts me and i can't do it. so thank you to you if you can. i don't admire you enough to aspire to be like you, but i really appreciate you.

and they say boys aren't observant.

the other day, we were going out for a good-bye dinner as several of us were leaving detroit. tanner says to me, you put eyelash stuff on. that looks hot. nevermind that i wear it EVERYDAY. he said i looked hot. i heart him.

life size.

time.

i waste so much of it. i'm going to stop doing that. tomorrow.

******

i'm thinking about going blonde again.

self.

do you think it's bad that i really like the photo of myself to the right there. the profile picture. several reasons... for lack of anything better to talk about, i'll outline them for you...

1. look at that hair!
2. i like the way my chin sticks out past my hair.
3. have you seen my tan?
4. if you could see the full-size image, you'd know how H.O.T. i look in the reflection
5. i can remember that night... i was on spring break in daytona beach, and sarah and i were getting ready to go out. it was a good time.
6. i like the angle of my chest and the small amount of definition of my clavicle.
7. i like the artistic edge to the photo.
8. i like that you can see the flash in the mirror, but you can't see the person taking the photo.

that's all.

the entry that lacks a good title.

today's the official start day of the scheduling of 4th yr rotations. biggest problem is, i don't really want to do any 4th yr rotations. does anyone have any spare motivation?

*yawn* nights.

i'm working nights this week. OB nights. which sounds a lot worse than it actually is i think. for instance, last night - here's what i did...

8:25pm - nap at mark and tanner's apartment
9:20pm - tanner wakes me up by rubbing my back and singing a little diddy about it being time to go pull babies from vaginas.
9:22pm - run home, shower, reclothe for the "day"
9:42pm - hospital bound
9:52pm - run up the secret back entrance stairs to the OB floor
10:00pm - catch up with the night resident, who proceeds to tell me that there's nothing to do, and that i can go claim a call room and she'll call if something comes up
10:02pm - watch grey's anatomy while printing articles for a presentation i have to do wednesday morning
10:44pm - sob silently while watching grey's anatomy alone
11:00pm - go to bed
4:15am - wake up to ringing phone, it's the night resident who proceeds to tell me that there is a new patient, but that she forgot i was there, and thus had already done everything, but i should come up to look at this awesome example of ferning which is what happens when you wipe some amniotic fluid onto a glass slide and look at it under the microscope - a test to verify that your water has in fact broken
4:19am - arrive on OB floor, look at ferning, sit at nurse's station waiting for futher instructions while the night resident talks to the attending
4:22am - am told to go back to bed
4:22:07am - leave OB floor for call room
5:20am - phone alarm goes off
5:25am - phone alarm snooze goes off
5:30am - arrive back on OB floor to round on my post-partum patients
5:58am - finish rounding and writing progress notes; wait for morning team to arrive
6:30am - sit through morning check-out with day team
6:48am - grab breakfast; run in to sarah in the cafeteria; tell her about the night
7:00am - sit through a lecture... about... ???? oh yeah... epidural abscess. you don't care, i promise.
8:02am - leave the hospital feeling refreshed and ready to start the day.

don't forget breakfast.

the other day i almost passed out while holding a retractor in a woman's vagina. it was a long long case, and even though i had eaten breakfast, and i didn't feel particularly hungry, i all of a sudden started to feel like i was going to vomit. then i started sweating and the doctor looks up at me and asks if i'm ok. i mumble something about not feeling well, and he told me to step back and sit down. the circulator (the nurse in the room who is not sterile and gets things for those of us who are sterile) put a wet towel on my forehead and lectured me about the importance of eating breakfast. it wasn't a lecture really... she was super nice. i ended up leaving the room and eating some peanut butter crackers and orange juice. i felt much better afterwards. but what i learned from the scrub tech (the person in the room who is sterile and hands all the instruments to the surgeon) is that it's always better to step out as soon as you start to feel that way. the last thing you want to do is fall and contaminate everything. now THAT would be embarrassing.

and always eat breakfast.

three's a crowd.

this post is not for the faint of heart. i'm going to use the word vagina. you've been warned.

******

today i started my week of gyn surgery. as in gynecologic. i spent the morning watching the backs of people who were standing in a small semi-circle around the object of intense attention. then, in the afternoon, i became one-third of that semi-circle. my resident had clinic this afternoon, so i was the only one to scrub in for the afternoon cases. the first was kinda boring, but the second was pretty cool.

we have the patient in the lithotomy position - you know what i mean - stirrups. then the three of us stand in a semi-circle between the legs. the lady had a hysterectomy several years ago and now her vagina was collapsing in on itself, so we rebuilt it for her. with mesh. it was a very interesting procedure, and i think we got good results. good times, huh?

catch.

i helped deliver a baby today. meaning i put my hands where the resident told me to and held on. those things come out slippery!